CHOICE

I'm at my grandmother's place and as I sit on her bed, I'm taken back 3 years to when I sat in the exact same place without having to put the slightest thought into it. The feelings, the emotions came rushing back into me like the water escaping from an open dam. Life always gives us a choice and what we decide do with that often leads us to one of two paths, i.e., happiness or guilt. As I sit here, I contemplate every choice that I have ever made. I have seen a man look at his dead wife's photograph. I have seen a brother cry over his mother's loss, I have seen a man being told that he has not much time to live and that nothing can be done, I have seen a mother cry as she held her child for the first time. These are too many emotions a person feels in his day-to-day life. Materialistic choices are easy to make, as in to make a choice between jobs, education, clothes etc. But what about the emotional choices? How does one make all the right emotional choices making sure he gets happiness and not guilt by choosing the wrong things? He can't! It's like my favourite motivational speaker Les Brown says, "You have got to be willing to risk. If you are not willing to risk, you can't grow in life. Life has no power when you are not willing to risk. It's said to laugh is to risk appearing the fool, to weep is to risk appearing sentimental, to reach out for another is to risk involvement, to expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self, to place your ideas and your dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss, to love is to risk not being loved in return, to live is to risk dying, to hope is to risk despair, to try is to risk failure. But risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is NOTHING!" You can avoid sorrow and pain by choosing the easy way out, take no risks, let go of things you want and need because you are too scared to make the choice. I have over the past few years chosen to pray for another person unconditionally though I have no great faith in God, but knowing that that person has faith in him made me want to pray. I have also chosen to choose myself over others so many times in so many ways. I have chosen to not express my feelings to people including my family at times, and at the same time have also chosen to pour out my thoughts and feelings to the rawest of my soul. I have chosen to be a part of another person's sadness and sadness alone and help them walk through it, and have chosen to stay out of their happiness as I have felt I didn't deserve it. So if a person asked me if I regretted any of my decisions, my answer would have to be YES! But would I make all the same decisions again? My answer would still be YES! Because in the end, the beauty of every human being comes from all the choices they have made and such beauty only grows in time and outlasts time.

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